Wednesday, August 10, 2011

My Secret Ingredient

I'm not writing this for comments or for anything else, but have decided that this is part of MY journey, not just my surrogacy journey, but my LIFE journey.  People will judge me either way, that's what people do, it's human nature, and let's face it... for most people, it's an ego boost. I know it is for me.
I think I've handled the last few days pretty well all things considered.  The things considered would be that i'm already an emotional wreck of course lol.

I've been told that I put my life out to the public... but don't we all? Isn't that what we all do when we share anything? We all share out feelings, journeys, experiences, advice and even our love with others. I certainly shouldn't be judged for doing that... to have a different view on things, to want to share with others. If it weren't for people who shared, no one else would have people to judge.  Am I mislead?

I am a second timer teen mom and a traditional surrogate who not only lost her IP's in the third trimester, but also lost her relationship, and I have no job. How much more controversial could I be? How many people can say that they were judged by over 120k people when I was mentioned in an online blog about surrogacy. 

I've had to learn to deal with the scrutiny involved with my life over the last few months. I've had to learn that life doesn't just hit you with one thing at a time so that you can "deal" with things one by one, but instead, it sometimes keeps hitting you to see what you're made of.  What you can handle. To what extreme you can deal with. 

This is a blog to show others what I'm made of.  What I can handle. What extreme situations I can deal with. 

I don't think I'm 1 in 6 billion. I know others have done what I have done. I know that I'm nothing news worthy if you will.  I know that many others have accomplished much greater things.

For now on, this isn't about opinions of others, it is about me sharing my life, with whomever is willing to share it with me, with whomever can HANDLE my opinions, my views and the way I choose to lead my life.  No holding back, but not being rude. No extreme dramatics, but some mild exaggeration.

This is my NEW blog, branching off of an old one.  This isn't just about surrogacy anymore, but instead about my journey of LIFE, surrogacy will just have a part in it, as surrogacy ISN'T my entire life. It is a part of it that includes others. 

As many parts of my life there is, I want to share each part... every part of me that I can share... every secret ingredient.