A lot of surrogates agree that money topics are NOT our favorite ones.
I spoke to my IP's a few nights ago, and of course, they wanted to know about the money aspect. They definitely aren't the type to bring it up often, as in two months, this is the FIRST time they have brought it up.
Having spoken to THEM about it, I realize that there are some things that probably a lot of people don't understand about surrogacy in that way.
A surrogates "reimbursement" is non-taxable. This is to help with all the payables involved inthe pregnancy. This could include a million things. Food, clothes, food, counselling, helping with sitters, travel for appointments etc etc etc need to be paid for us. I did my first surrogacy for 2k all inclusive. This did not even cover the food expenses for the last trimester. So you can imagine just how quickly this money does go.
A lot of us require extra rest [especially while carrying multiples] and our reimbursement helps to get sitters so that we can get the rest required to have a healthy pregnancy. Especially if we have other children under school age, it is strongly recommended by doctors that the surrogate and her partner make sure to have one on one time, as the surrogacy in general can take quite a toll on the relationship.
Most people think that the couple will pay said surrogate something like 50k. This is not true. In Canada, reimbursements are LEGAL. A lot of intended parents are contacting me and telling me that it is illegal to give a surrogate money. I don't know about any of you, but I can't afford to do another surrogacy for free. The emotional strain alone warrants or reimbursement. "Reasonable Reimbursement" is legally NEEDED to have a surrogate. No law in Canada will tell you that you HAVE to do this for FREE. No court or judge would ever pass such a law.
REASONABLE is within 15-25k in Canada. However, in the US, there is no limitation to what a surrogate can ask from Intended Parents.
I've found that a lot of people don't realize that in Canada, the Intended Parents do not have to pay for any health coverage... much like France or Great Britain, we have an amazing health system. During the pregnancy, we are taken care of. The medical bills that it does not cover however, include the IVF procedure and medications that come with it. This would fall under our medical coverage that we pay for for dental, optical and prescriptions. Most people do have this, and I know that for my coverage I pay something like 17$/month for family coverage.
We are also going through an agency this time. The main reason I went though an agency was because I didn't want to have to handle the money issues. I wanted to make sure that someone else could handle this part FOR me. I'm HORRIBLE when it comes to asking for money, which is one of the reasons my last surrogacy ended so badly. I wanted a third party to take care of all of that.
Money Money Money
Yuck
We are getting into the contract phase though, which is why this even came up.
It's good though, I'm excited that things are moving along. I have to wait now to see when the dr is setting up all my testing and screening, and I get to meet my IP's and most likely we will sign contracts then. We want to be together and we want to have a lot done every time I go.
I asked permission to tell you all a little more about them, and I'm so lucky, they are more than happy to be announced in my blogs. How fortunate am I?!
Tammy and John live in the Greater Toronto Area [not far out of though]. It will be amazing for the transfer and testing and just about everything until I am released to my OB office. This way, I am the only one who really has to travel, and I know that they will have the chance to be a part of it all! You have NO idea how happy that made me!
So..... we're about 21 weeks from transfer!
20 weeks from my Egg Donation.
Yep.
You read that right.
We're doing a shared cycle... that is... my IP's that I'm donating to and my IP's that I'm doing surrogacy for [different couples] are sharing MY cycle lol
We're retrieving MY eggs, so that they can put them into THEIR surrogate, and then we're also going to be synced up with my IP's ED so that HER eggs can be transferred into ME 3-5 days later.
Wedding is in about 19 weeks as well. CRAZY.
I've been workin for about three weeks now. Also crazy. It's helping the time go by though, that's for sure! Hoping to do another VLOG on youtube by the end of the weekend to update there as well. It's going to go by SO fast now! WOOHOO!
I spoke to my IP's a few nights ago, and of course, they wanted to know about the money aspect. They definitely aren't the type to bring it up often, as in two months, this is the FIRST time they have brought it up.
Having spoken to THEM about it, I realize that there are some things that probably a lot of people don't understand about surrogacy in that way.
A surrogates "reimbursement" is non-taxable. This is to help with all the payables involved inthe pregnancy. This could include a million things. Food, clothes, food, counselling, helping with sitters, travel for appointments etc etc etc need to be paid for us. I did my first surrogacy for 2k all inclusive. This did not even cover the food expenses for the last trimester. So you can imagine just how quickly this money does go.
A lot of us require extra rest [especially while carrying multiples] and our reimbursement helps to get sitters so that we can get the rest required to have a healthy pregnancy. Especially if we have other children under school age, it is strongly recommended by doctors that the surrogate and her partner make sure to have one on one time, as the surrogacy in general can take quite a toll on the relationship.
Most people think that the couple will pay said surrogate something like 50k. This is not true. In Canada, reimbursements are LEGAL. A lot of intended parents are contacting me and telling me that it is illegal to give a surrogate money. I don't know about any of you, but I can't afford to do another surrogacy for free. The emotional strain alone warrants or reimbursement. "Reasonable Reimbursement" is legally NEEDED to have a surrogate. No law in Canada will tell you that you HAVE to do this for FREE. No court or judge would ever pass such a law.
REASONABLE is within 15-25k in Canada. However, in the US, there is no limitation to what a surrogate can ask from Intended Parents.
I've found that a lot of people don't realize that in Canada, the Intended Parents do not have to pay for any health coverage... much like France or Great Britain, we have an amazing health system. During the pregnancy, we are taken care of. The medical bills that it does not cover however, include the IVF procedure and medications that come with it. This would fall under our medical coverage that we pay for for dental, optical and prescriptions. Most people do have this, and I know that for my coverage I pay something like 17$/month for family coverage.
We are also going through an agency this time. The main reason I went though an agency was because I didn't want to have to handle the money issues. I wanted to make sure that someone else could handle this part FOR me. I'm HORRIBLE when it comes to asking for money, which is one of the reasons my last surrogacy ended so badly. I wanted a third party to take care of all of that.
Money Money Money
Yuck
We are getting into the contract phase though, which is why this even came up.
It's good though, I'm excited that things are moving along. I have to wait now to see when the dr is setting up all my testing and screening, and I get to meet my IP's and most likely we will sign contracts then. We want to be together and we want to have a lot done every time I go.
I asked permission to tell you all a little more about them, and I'm so lucky, they are more than happy to be announced in my blogs. How fortunate am I?!
Tammy and John live in the Greater Toronto Area [not far out of though]. It will be amazing for the transfer and testing and just about everything until I am released to my OB office. This way, I am the only one who really has to travel, and I know that they will have the chance to be a part of it all! You have NO idea how happy that made me!
So..... we're about 21 weeks from transfer!
20 weeks from my Egg Donation.
Yep.
You read that right.
We're doing a shared cycle... that is... my IP's that I'm donating to and my IP's that I'm doing surrogacy for [different couples] are sharing MY cycle lol
We're retrieving MY eggs, so that they can put them into THEIR surrogate, and then we're also going to be synced up with my IP's ED so that HER eggs can be transferred into ME 3-5 days later.
Wedding is in about 19 weeks as well. CRAZY.
I've been workin for about three weeks now. Also crazy. It's helping the time go by though, that's for sure! Hoping to do another VLOG on youtube by the end of the weekend to update there as well. It's going to go by SO fast now! WOOHOO!
So who defines what reasonable reimbursements are legal? Like would rent be considered reasonable? A new bed to be comfortable? A car to get to appointments? Are there actual limits in Canada?
ReplyDeleteI've always been curious where the line is, if there is one. Or is there a lot of grey areas?
We have to keep receipts for everything. After about 18k, we can be questioned for all of the receipts and it must add up. It would be VERY hard to justify large expenses unless the actual shape of the original [we'll use bed as an example] was really bad [could see/feel the wires really well]. A NEW car would be unjustifiable, however, if the surrogate didn't HAVE a car at ALL, and got something that would have been within their means to begin with, then that would be considered reasonable. There are definitely a lot of grey areas, because our surrogacy laws just aren't there yet. The reason it has to be reasonable expenses is because of our health care... however, surrogates in the US don't pay ANYTHING for their medical expenses either. I was actually investigated during my surrogacy, and because I needed welfare half way through, they deducted my ENTIRE reimbursement [200$/month]. I've seensomeone actually lie to the government while on welfare [I told them when I applied at 18 weeks], and then take 25k. If said person were to ever be caught... they would pay back the ENTIRE amount. The "grey" area is mostly for people who are doing this for monetary gain, or who are lying to the government, which I don't agree with. For me, it's black and white.
ReplyDeletehmm idk. i don't understand what you're doing with 2 couples?? going to give eggs to a couple to get pregnant? and then you get pregnant with 2nd couple egg or sperm? confusing :)
ReplyDelete