welll....
we are now a whole month into our second trimester! only 3 more to go and we will be in our third trimester! Isn't it going by so fast?!
I only took one picture so far today, but I'm getting there, I swear haha I took one laying down for you all, and i definitely see a bigger difference in my laying down ones than the ones I take standing... my muscles are apparently getting a bit loose in there, will have tow ork out a bit in between these pregnancies so that I don't hang out as much next time hahahaha
we are now a whole month into our second trimester! only 3 more to go and we will be in our third trimester! Isn't it going by so fast?!
I only took one picture so far today, but I'm getting there, I swear haha I took one laying down for you all, and i definitely see a bigger difference in my laying down ones than the ones I take standing... my muscles are apparently getting a bit loose in there, will have tow ork out a bit in between these pregnancies so that I don't hang out as much next time hahahaha
When people are asking me how I feel, all I can say is... big. I'm not THAT big yet... but... I'm getting there and starting to feel EVERY SINGLE ounce haha
For 16 weeks, each baby is now 6 inches long [WOW!] and weighs 4.5 ounces already! They are getting soo big now! By 20 wweeks, they will have reached about 10 inches, which I also find CRAZY haha
Believe or not, both of those picture depict 16 weeks! So much of a difference already! The next one I have for twins is at 20 weeks, so... only 4 more weeks until I can post it hahahahaha
I had to go in yesterday to see my doctor.
Everything is okay of course, but he thinks they my hypERthyroidism has changed into hypOthyroidism, which would mean that from going overactive .. it would now be underworking lol Pregnancy induced thyroid problems are a bit unpredictable, so it could go either way as it pleases, which as you can all imagine, is quite annoying. One week I'm running to the bathroom thanks to everything being at a high speed [including digestion] and the next week, I'm backed up! LOL
They checked my weight and fundal height real quick, we're at 113.5 lbs, which is good, we're now at a weight gain of 15.5 lbs about, and she measured me at 26cm! HOLY SMOKERONIES! That would be about right for 26 weeks with a singleton! Boys oh boys! haha
I also had some questions asked to me on facebook, and thought they were really good, so I'll answer them here for you all!
1. What got you into being a surrogate?
Most people just say "to help people". Yes, that's the biggest part of this. I do this because I have family members who had a very hard time conceiving on their own, and after watching them as I grew up struggle, I became to understand that infertility isn't just for those who were much older, or those who had cancer. It effects a LOT of people. The struggles and pain that those people go through... it's so.. touching. I hope my IP's don't mine me saying this, but they have been trying to have a baby for 10 years! 10 stinking years! That's 120 cycles! Can you imagine every month praying and hoping for 120 months?! I know people who have tried for 48 cycles.. and have just about given up... 120!! Imagine how emotional and happy they were when all of a sidden, after one cycle... they were suddenly expecting a baby! Imagine their joy of holding these babies for the first time... after 120 months! THAT is why I do this.
2. How far between babies will you get pregnant for someone again? Like will you wait 6 months, a year, etc...
There is a surrogacy requirement to wit 6 months in between pregnancies, it doesn't matter if it is a natural or csection birth. I do have concerns for someone's health who doesn't wait 12 months in between pregnancies with a csection though. I think that it's just not enough time to heal if you expect to be pregnant again. I will wait 6 months minimum after any natural birth, and 9-12 months after a csection. I will need at least that much time to get my cycles going, feel comfortable enough to be pregnant again, and have my family alright again to do this. Surrogacy journeys aren't just about healing enough to be pregnant again, but it always takes a toll on the surro family... it's a lot of hard work to make a baby for someone else, especially if they don't live close enough to be there to experience it with you.
3. Do you get paid to do it? And if you don't but someone offered to pay would you accept if say it was the right person?
Yes, most people get paid well do to this. Most first time surrogates ask for a base fee [just for them to be pregnant] of $15k to $18k. Yep. that's right! That is before any other expenses like medical, travel, clothes or even food. I won't put what I'm doing this for, but, I can say that it doesn't even cover the pregnancy expenses, but it does come close. I'm not making any money off of this surrogacy. Next time I will be a little more generous to myself, but I won't be asking anywhere near what a second time surrogate asks, I won't even be asking anywhere close to what a first time surrogate asks... I do get hurt when people assume I'm in this for the money though, for those who didn't know this, I'm not getting paid for this, none of the money I am receiving comes to me, it is just gong toward pregnancy expenses like travel, medications, meals at the hospital when I'm there for appointments and a little bit of my food. That's it!
4. Is it hard knowing you're having a baby and it's not yours to keep when you leave the hospital?
I honestly feel like if anyone DOES feel like this after the birth... they should not become a surrogate again until they have seeked out some kind of counselling. I do not see these babies as my own, I have nothing prepared for them, I don't even think about their needs after birth beyond pumping for them. I am known as the "Auntie" and I will hopefully be a part of their lives, but I am quite done with having chidlren for myself. I think that it will feel good to know that I helped someone achieve parenthood without having to torture MYSELF with the routin of getting up all the time in the night etc. As a TS, these are GENETICALLY my babies, in my heart, they are my nieces/nephews. I think that I will feel relief, and joy when I get to leave without them haha Of course, I will be sad for awhile that I can't see them all the time, but as long as their parents keep in contact, keep me a part of their lives... then I couldn't be happier! I'll feel like I dodged a bullet hahahaha You know when you're late... and you're like omg... I better not be pregnant.. I do NOT want a baby...and then you take a test, it's negative, and then your period starts and you think OMFG THANK GOD? Yeah.. that'll be me after the papers are signed LOLMy 10 month old JUST started to sleep through the night... and I can not do that over again haha It may be hard to understand, but from the MOMENT I seen "PREGNANT" on that test, I automatically texted my IM and was like "YOU'RE PREGNANT! YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE A BABY!". I never even though, omg I'm pregnant! It was always their pregnancy!
I love questions, so keep them coming so that I can add them to here, and I'm going to vlog these tonight as well!
I hope everyone is doing well, leave me lots of comments though! I love them!
-Cathleen
Hello Cat,
ReplyDeletefollowing you now. I was your friend in surrogatemother.
Great post! Just to clarify. I worked with an agency and I did not ask for money. Its what the agency decides. Most contracts that are 15k-18k INCLUDE ALL expenses, food, meds, travel.. so those things are not extra. My contract did have the extra for bed rest and salary difference. I was put off work at 30 weeks and my IF covered the difference of my salary so that we wouldnt be out any income. I strongly suggest you look out for yourself and for sure be more generous for yourself next time around! xoxo I am still in AWE of how incredibly generous you are being.. and I truly hope your IPs know how LUCKY they are to have met you! IVF alone is more than what you are getting!
ReplyDeleteSorry, I meant for US surrogates. Here in Canada we can only get 18k anyway, so it's not like we're making as much as some people think. In the states, they can literally ask whatever they want for extras, transfer fees, insemination fees, whatever you could think of! Also, they are paid for experience, where we can't be unless it's under the table, which I also find kind of sad.
ReplyDelete