Positive Ovulation Test... Again?

BAHAHAHAHA Don't know what the heck is going on, but yesterday they were - again, and today....

The first line is the control line and the second one is the TEST line... YAY!  I don't know what's going on... but I'll take it! We're both jumping around, the guys are out running errands, and I don't know why I even tested, but I did.  Soooo, I guess my IF will be sore by the time I'm done with him!!  bahahahahahaha.  

YAY

When Not To Assume

I had to post this today.  I know I try to express my feelings as much as I can to you so that you can understand what it is like to be a surrogate.

Well, I had been speaking to an amazing same sex couple only 5.5 hours away from me, which is the closest I've even encountered who were searching for a traditional surrogate.  I hadn't had contact with them for a few weeks, and seeing as how they were so perfect, I figured they had found someone and didn't know how to tell me.

I was wrong.

They had simply taken time out, away from it all.  I got a message asking me what was new from them, honestly quite surprised to hear from them.  As you can imagine, they were quite upset with me.  I asked them to read my blog, and as soon as they had, they had messaged me.  I felt absolutely horrible.  I was crying.  Like I had let a close friend down.  Broken a promise.  Tattled on a friend to whom had kept secrets for you in the past.

This world is filled with both glorious and horrendous surprises... this was not one of those glorious ones.  I was fully expecting them to tell me that they had been matched and writing up contracts.  I'm not only in shock, but in despair, for they are truly a great couple.  I'm sad that this has happened, truly, and I hope that this does not happen to anyone else.  It is quite heart breaking to know that you've completely shattered a couple's heart. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to call them or message them when/if I become available in all honesty, since I don't know if they even ever want to talk to me again.

If they decide to read this.. all I can say is that I'm so sorry... although, I know that will never help what I've done and I can only pray that it even makes a difference.  They are definitely a couple I would want to work with, and I have to tell everyone, if you're a surrogate, these guys would be absolutely wonderful.  I'm just sorry I won't be working with them.

Cathleen

OFFICIALLY

IN THE TWO WEEK WAIT!

Yes... that's right.  We're not just waiting to test.  okay, that's a lie... There will be no waiting because everyone who knows me knows that I don't wait... I wait 5 days... and only because 6dpo is the absolute earliest time you can get a +.  Other than that, I would be testing - now.

Okay.. so I will admit that the insems aren't my favorite part of surrogacy.  BUT... they get me to this point, where I get to blog and tell you that there are now 13.5 days until we should get a +.  Yep... in 13.5 short days, I could be on here telling you all that I'm knocked up and ready to bloat.  LOL

Hopefully in 2 weeks you'll start to get belly pictures and then I can start scanning stuff to show you!!

Anyone who's ever tried to get pregnant knows that this time of the wait SUCKS.  NO ONE likes the 2WW.  The reason being that it's soooooooooooooo long.


I am now laying here after having done the insems for the second time.  LOL  Yeah... all women know what I'm feeling right now [ew].  LOL  Yep... that's right.  So home insems aren't that glorious. lol  They aren't, but they can be much more intimate .. that sounds wrong, but I mean with your IPs.  You're not working with doctors and machines but rather with people and feelings.  Isn't that what surrogacy is all about?  I understand that some surros do IUI because it increases the chances of conception.  I like it this way to be honest, with all the real feeling and emotion.

Alright... SOOOOOO.  LOL   I will shortly be on with tests bahahahahah I have ovr 50 tests ready [thank goodness] and I'm ready to start to take them!!  I feel like I should be testing tomorrow!  LOL I'm going to start testing in five days, even though the chances are minimal.. I have tests that measure at 10mui/ml... so they will be the earliest to pick it up. woohoo!

HAVE A GREAT DAY.

Cathleen

The Excitement... The Nerves... The Messy House

My friends arrive in an HOUR!  I'm getting the kids ready to go right now!!  I woke up with a runny nose, and we certainly didn't get the house cleaned last night lol  We DID try, but we also failed.  Which is fine since we have all week.  Hubby worked 7 days straight so that he could get more time off next week, and while doing so, we were both too tired to clean at night.

Having not even turned the baby's room into the spare room, they will have to laugh at us while we attempt to take the baby's crib down tonight, as we have not done that in a YEAR.  lol  I'm hoping they don't think too little of us for being sooo disorganized.  I really do blame it on the children and current family disaster [everyone is fine, just a few dramatic family members].    I think we all have a Monster In Law... and I certainly DON'T feel alone in that, as most of my friends have reassured me that even though most aren't as bad as mine, there are some of my friends [both male AND female] who will admit to wanted to strangle their MIL's on a regular basis.

Because the house is so messy, I have this picture for you all, rest assured that this is NOT how messy MY house is, but rather, how bad it COULD be :P  Hopefully it will give some humor to my problem haha

I promise I can see floor in each of my rooms!!  LOL

I have told myself that I will eat out today with them so that I can avoid cooking in the kitchen, as it's the worst room, Lexi's room just need tidying and so does Gabey's, but the kitchen is sooo easy to have messed up!

Lexi and Gabey have probably  been mentioned before, but they are my children :)  Now Lexi [Alexandra] is 26 months and Gabey [Gabriel] is 7 months.  I'm sure I've mentioned them before, although, I have tried to keep this blog about surrogacy.  This week, the two merge so I figure it's okay haha.

I will have loads and loads of updates as the week goes on.  

I took an OPK last night, and it was darker again! I think I'll get a positive today :D  This mean insems tonight or tomorrow depending on my IPs.  I think the final test would be on the 8th either way, so I'm amazingly excited that my 2WW goes through another month, I find it's easier to think that December is close, and then that means the first 4 days are gone, and then there are only 8 days left lol I don't know.  Everyone hates the 2WW.

Please think of Candy today, she's been testing a few days for a + OPK and she's getting nervous haha  The latest day she could get a + is on the 30th I think.  I can't wait for her to get a + !!  Her and I will be amazingly close in gestation if we both get pregnant this month.  She's also using clomid, so we could both potentially b having twins as well.  I'm taking is because my cycle lengths are soo long [34 days] and it's healthier to have shorter cycle, which is what the clomid offers, which is a maximum of 32 days.  Those 2 days make a big difference!!  

Alrighty, I have a half hour before I have to be out the door now!! Soooo exciting, but I have to brush my teeth!! LOL  the kids aren't ven dressed, I woke up and realized that I hadn't blogged!  

If anyone has ideas on what I should talk about next blog, let me know!!  I usually have a small project that I'm researching about, but lately I was avoiding this since I had so much to do.  In return, I've been a bit boring hahahaha.

HAVE AN AMAZING DAY.  They are staying here but we are all computer addicts and tonight I will blog to give you all a play by play.

Cathleen

It's Really Happening!

So, I started O testiing a couple days ago as you all know! 

Today when I tested, it was darker than usual... that is... there was a second line today!!  So I'm going to take them 12 hours apart now until we get a +!!  I took it at about 9am, so I'm going to take the next one at 9pm [another 9 hours and 10 minutes].  

My friends arrive in 21 hours 9 minutes!  How exciting is that!?

I'm having mild cramps, and I'm about to take some pamprin to see if it helps or not... if not it's not a big deal, the cramps aren't bad, just twinges.  

Hopefully next week I'll be able to switch over to real prenatal vitamins, the ones I'm taking I have to take three times a day and are less concentrated, as I usually can't take prenatal vitamins... too much for my system at one time lol

I have a friend named Candy who is also testing, so I'm hoping she gets a + today!!  She is also using clomid, and the latest she will ovulate is Wednesday I think.  Can't wait!!

I also have a friend named Joanne who is doing a transfer on the 3rd, so only a few days left for her, only 6 days!!

My friend Kare is waiting for her IF to get back from work [on the 10th] so that they can get down to the legal side of things and get contracts going.

Everyone is so busy!!  It's great!! And I hope they allll get pregnant this cycle!!  Pray for them!

Cathleen

Less Than A Week!

Until our friends T and C arrive!!  We're all starting to bounce around and of course, I can never believe that they're actually coming.  It's like when you're in grade 5, and you dream of graduating, but it's surreal until you actually get there and they hand you that diploma.  Okay, even THEN you have a hard time to believe it.  Hopefully I won't be pinching myself and poking them to make sure they're not real the whole week.

I feel like I've known them forever, and them visiting has always been a "I wish" thing, never a "okay, we're planning on coming in x amount of months, let's make an itinerary for when we're there!".  Not that I wrote up an itinerary....  Okay... I actually am... but I mean... I may never see them again! I want to make sure they have fun!

Has anyone got any good ideas of activities we could do?

I'm barely nervous, and mostly excited.  I think I'm going to hug them and they're going to end up thinking I'm a freak... how do you greet someone who you've wanted to meet for 6 months?  They're like my best friends, and I've never met them.  They know all of my deep dark secrets, and I have never gazed into their eyes in person.  I've told them things and feelings that I wouldn't dare write in a journal of any kind, and I have never sat down at a meal with them.  It's just a little breath taking at first to realize that it's actually happening.

I want to work out a meal schedule too, interesting Canadian food only please!!  Hopefully they will also help cooking and add some English foods!!

CD 7 so far!!

Gotta love tracking cycles lol It's always on my mind.  Every morning I update myself on what CD I am and what it  means, check CM and cervical location... what a lot of work, which seems to be routine now :)

Alrighty, I'm done for now hahahahha

SOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED!!!!  4 days until T and C leave home to come!

Cathleen

Just For Fun!

I found out that I can look at my stats!!  Here are some of them, this was the most interesting for me, and I had no idea that so many people actually read my blogs!! It completely blew my mind and had me blushing.  Nor did I know that I was sooo international :P Just kidding, I know exactly who looked at it from the UK and Australia, I kind of bugged them into it. But it looks good for me! LOL

It's a big blurry because I've made it a bit small to try to fit it on here without disturbing everything else on my page like the cycle calendars did [sorry about that by the way].